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Marian's Rhetoric Good Bad or Indifferent

Mental Abuse from Up-Side Down Map Reading

     This last 30 day trip in the little car going across country was a bit of an education to say the least. Traveling with Bob and sitting so close was very hard to turn the map around without him "seeing" it. It is so close in that car that there are no secrets.

His question-- What are you doing? That was his first remark. Answer-- I am turning the map around so I can tell you where to go. Question-- Why do you do that , why can't you leave it the way it is and re-train your brain? Answer--Retrain My Brain! Are you kidding!! All these years doing it my way and now I have to do it your way. WOW! I told him that wasn't so easy as he might think. I took my head and tried to turn it up-side down. I dam near twisted it off. Besides in that little car the room is quite limited. Too much moving around interferes with the driver. So now I have to "think" upside down .Turning "right" is really turning "left" and turning "left is really turning "right". Does all this really make sense to anyone?

     I told Bob I would really try to leave the map straight on my lap an "try" to read it properly if there is such a thing as properly. I ask if I could turn it a little bit side ways. Ha! Ha! was his only remark. He told me I wouldn't make a very good pilot reading a chart on a ship. Who is on a ship I ask? Then I got some Navy talk about ships and charts an etc.

     Map reading for many miles and many hours and 16 states later I learned a lot. Going into St. Louis Mo. on Highway 70 and going out on Highway 44 was a real experience, 3:30 PM in the middle of work traffic. It was exciting too. As we got closer to the city Bob said, "find me a By-pass" to go around St. Louis----. FIND HIM A BY-PASS! WOW! How do I find a by-pass! All these little colored roads going in circles around the city. He said, "find a highway with 3 numbers." I don't want 3 numbers, I'm looking for "44" not anything with 3 numbers. Now all of this conversation is going on and he is driving 70 MPH. I'm trying to read a map right side up-- looking for a highway with 3 numbers and all I saw was 255 and 270 on the map. I didn't want that and nothing showed up on the highway. I was also watching traffic fly by us and us flying by them. By this time I'm getting another lesson----- 3 numbers is a by-pass---- TOO LATE--- we are already on "some" highway going "someplace" where, I DON'T KNOW ---- I looked up and thought "Oh Lordy " If I ever get through this alive I promise to read a map PROPERLY.

     I looked up and there was " Highway 44". I said, "right lane" , "right lane", Go Go. Then I wondered if I should have said , "left lane" left lane". To late again we were on it and it was OK.-----! I looked at Bob and if he had had a cigar in his mouth he would have had it bit in half, but it was only Dentyne gum. His mouth was very busy with it. We made it!!!

     Because I have the map I'm suppose to know where we are. Well, I'll tell you, from now on I'll know more about map reading "RIGHT SIDE UP !! After 6,427 miles of this trip that ride through St. Louis still sticks in my mind. I think Bob will remember it too.

     Our trip was great and that little car never missed a beat. We had 30 days of fun and excitement. The Mental Abuse as I call it must have paid off because I'm going to teach map reading to anyone that needs it !!! Ha! Ha! but we aren't going through St Louis like that again. Bob is getting to be a real Barney O'Field .

     Now we have to rest up so we can go again someday.

Ride Safe Everybody and Read Maps Right Side Up

Marian PS   Do you know how many 18 wheelers I saw the underneath side of on this trip? A whole bunch!! PPS I really hate to admit that my map reading needs some repair work